A Word About Gum
Nothing major to report beyond the fact that some joker got me heated up when I saw him casually fling his lit cigarette on the train platform. Why is it so difficult to snuff and trash? Selfish mongrel.
I am, of course, a complete hypocrite because I spit it my gum out like a short stop when the flavor’s gone. Sometimes I even make a game of it. I drop it from my mouth straight down and kick the wad in mid air at selected targets: stop signs, telephone poles. pets, anything within 12 yards is fair game.
Which means that more than one person has cursed me after stepping on my spent gum on a hot August afternoon. Stepping on gum is a feeling like no other. Your shoe feels a strange connection to the asphalt. A certain undefinable bond. It doesn’t want to leave, but alas, foot in motion, it must. The connection—almost magnet-like—is quite strong at first, but slips away quickly—only a few strings of fruit stripe hang on.
Gum is such a strange product. I wonder how these companies do with all the competitors chomping at their heels. Look at the ridiculous number of choices we have:
Trident
Bubble Yum
Orbit
Wrigley’s
Dentyne
Freedent
Carefree
Fruit Stripe
Extra
Juicy Fruit
Chicklets
Hubba Bubba
Big League Chew
If you were to create a gum brand, how would you differentiate it from this crowd? I think there may be room for an upscale gum, if you package it correctly and market it smartly. Call it Wallingford’s Chews or something victorian. Wrap each piece in a doiley. Or maybe an organic gum. Made from the natural resins of the Redling tree in nothern Colorado. Or a southwestern gum that only cowboys chew when they’re wranglin cattle. Call it Bighorn.
Jolt, the cola guys, are gettin the idea. They make a caffienated gum. Chew it for that extra kick. Not sure if I wanna get my caffeine that way, though.
G
I am, of course, a complete hypocrite because I spit it my gum out like a short stop when the flavor’s gone. Sometimes I even make a game of it. I drop it from my mouth straight down and kick the wad in mid air at selected targets: stop signs, telephone poles. pets, anything within 12 yards is fair game.
Which means that more than one person has cursed me after stepping on my spent gum on a hot August afternoon. Stepping on gum is a feeling like no other. Your shoe feels a strange connection to the asphalt. A certain undefinable bond. It doesn’t want to leave, but alas, foot in motion, it must. The connection—almost magnet-like—is quite strong at first, but slips away quickly—only a few strings of fruit stripe hang on.
Gum is such a strange product. I wonder how these companies do with all the competitors chomping at their heels. Look at the ridiculous number of choices we have:
Trident
Bubble Yum
Orbit
Wrigley’s
Dentyne
Freedent
Carefree
Fruit Stripe
Extra
Juicy Fruit
Chicklets
Hubba Bubba
Big League Chew
If you were to create a gum brand, how would you differentiate it from this crowd? I think there may be room for an upscale gum, if you package it correctly and market it smartly. Call it Wallingford’s Chews or something victorian. Wrap each piece in a doiley. Or maybe an organic gum. Made from the natural resins of the Redling tree in nothern Colorado. Or a southwestern gum that only cowboys chew when they’re wranglin cattle. Call it Bighorn.
Jolt, the cola guys, are gettin the idea. They make a caffienated gum. Chew it for that extra kick. Not sure if I wanna get my caffeine that way, though.
G
posted by Greg Monaco at 10:26 AM
3 Comments:
Did you forget nicotine gum??? that is a jolt.
Thanks for writing about the theymissyou.com
As a new NYC-er, I wondered about the ads and found you had written about them by googling it... I am writing a post (coming up on the 25th) on the subject and hope, as an ad guy, you'll go comment.
Cheers.
Interesting observation: in China there is so much gum on the sidewalk it just looks like so many dots that were intended to be part of the side walk. In fact I didn't even notice it, because it's just about omninpresent, until a friend pointed it out. On the other hand they smoke like fiends but you dont see any ciggy butts on the ground. They are pretty careful about getting them into a nearby butt can or tray. Hummmmm????
In Seattle, people started a gum wall. It's a disgusting idea, but it's actually quite beautiful if you step away from it. Google "seattle gum wall" to see a pic.
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