Cakeland

Sometimes you have it. Sometimes you don’t. For the past few days, I’ve been enjoying a healthy dose of self doubt. I’m certain you experience it the same way I do. The flashes of anxiety and the unrelenting questioning. Conversation becomes measured, over-calcuated, wooden. Going the safe route, the default state, retreading old ideas.

Afraid of what stupidity may come out of my mouth, I retreat. What will my words reveal? I feel as if everyone is peering into my soul, rousing the dormant fraud.

It’s crippling, really. And it washes over you and affects your every move, every word you choose, every action you take. There is no freedom in self doubt.

When I’m enjoying something, I’m not thinking. I’m in the moment, letting it wash over me. It’s feels easy.

Right now, I’m muddling through. Getting past the hard parts hoping to find the good bits. That’s Cakeland friends. It’s a place, a state of mind, another dimension. Cakeland is where impossible is possible. There are no negative prefixes, it’s all positive. I’m gonna find me a slice o that cake this weekend.

Yum.